Out of Breath

Walking up a few steps, bending down and trying to pick something up, walking and carrying something. Why, oh, Why?

I have to be patient but it is so difficult. All the discipline in the world can't help my disappointment. A hug and reassurance helps and I have to just give into the fact that I just can't do some of the smallest things yet.
I was standing at the hob yesterday, turning over chicken breasts as they sizzled away in garlic butter (a great find in the supermarket making the simplest food that little more interesting with very little effort!). Did I stand happily? Did I need help? was my breath calm and unconcerned. Ummm. I was happy, I didn't ask for help, but my breath was here and there. I noticed how difficult it was at times, finding undizziness(interesting word!) and focus.
I put myself through it to find comfort and normality in life. To achieve little things through the day.
Oh boy.
What will I be when I attempt some stairs?(we live in a bungalow) Currently stairs are impossible. A few steps or a slope have me slowing down and out of breath. I need to practice the yoga, do more around the house, but only when I can. Being unable to do such things without loosing the breath is a sign that I need to slow down, give myself time and be patient.
When the breath speeds up and shows me that I need to step back and find focus in doing less or slowing down a little, I have to accept that- just as I accept any symptoms as par for the course. Symptoms as simple as an uneasy breath are there to show me that my body is uneasy, I have to take note and answer without question. To question takes too long and too much anxiety. I am recovering, I am finding a different way of being and I have to accept how long it takes; no matter how long it takes.