Monthly Achievements, Again

Another list, this time brought together over the month.

I dug up some weeds for about five minutes. They were tall but had really short roots and just required a large fork- so no bending!
Two weeks later I took out the hand held loppers and attacked a Dogwood tree by our front path and some Snowberry by the front gate. Again it took less than 10 minutes and my husband cleared up after me, when he came back from work (useful aren't they!!!)

Began to tidy up our spare room, which we call the music room as it contains the piano, my flutes and all my music. It will also contain my OH's vinyl collection (over 1000 12" singles and albums). This task has so far taken the last four weeks with the help of my Mum, our cleaner Helen (bless her thoroughness) and IKEA's delivery service!!! Boxes and piles of sorting were put on the living room floor and occasionally on the bed for me to sit and wade through. But it is great to have the energy to do that and to sit on my heels on the floor for an hour with the shredder whirring in front of me is particularly cleansing.

Reading more, when I choose to and without dire consequences; I have finished a few books this month. As I used to do when I was a child, I have a few books running in tandem and pick up which ever book meets my mood. However it now takes me weeks or months to get through some books, at the age of 8,9! 10, I was reading each book in about 3 days!

Yoga class in the garden, using the iPad and various mats, blankets and bolsters on the grass. I have downloaded a few free classes from iTunes, perfect for beginners and thanks to a couple of good teachers I know I can sit back or lie down, or even adapt a few minutes, if I know particular poses are going to be too much. I have loved doing this in the garden a few times, hopefully as the summer moves on I can do this more often. This is also a great place for lying and doing yoga meditations-see my sunbathing post! (link)

I am loving my own space. As much as I would like to be a social thirty-something again, I remember now how much I love walking by myself, in solitude, with no sounds but my feet crunching and birds singing (I will content myself with sitting or lying in the garden for now and dream of the walking!). Time to myself indoors with nothing happening is bliss too. And I'm not straight on my own case when a day goes by and I don't achieve anything mind-blowing.

So another month, more little things happening. I have been told that I might be surprised at how little change there is in the first 6months and then how much change there is in the second 6months; I will wait with baited, but calm and steady, breath.

Reading

This has been one of my best tools to aid any sort of recovery. For years the rule on the street has been: If you have ME, you have an untreatable, incurable illness. This goes for the many other similar conditions such as Fibromyalgia, MCS and of course the other diagnosis given for ME sufferers CFS. If you find the right sources and read the right pages you will discover that over the last few years this rule has been changed. ME is totally treatable, totally curable and need not be a lifelong ailment that just has to be accepted and coped with.
I have just floated along with my condition for years, accepting what I was and dealing with niggles as they came along. When I hit the wall again 2 years ago I decided to rediscover the situation on the streets. From previous reading through the 1990's mostly and especially by contacting ME charities and online self-help websites I had discovered that any hope of recovery would see you spending a lot of money for very little chance of a worthwhile result.
The new search began. When I was well enough I spent an hour or so going through search engines and book reviews.The words that you use in search engines can be so important in finding the catalyst. Epilepsy Research had helped me a lot to rediscover my options and find me some kind of hope for controlling my seizures, This was my catalyst. I typed in ME Research. And discovered a lot. I found papers, University research projects, different trials and testing techniques. This was a good start. I watched lectures on YouTube, I read papers and charity magazines and learnt so much about why my body reacts like it does in different situations. Just knowing that each cell in the body has energy-making atoms and that in ME patients these atoms don't have the relevant parts to recreate the energy as quickly as in a healthy person, made me realise how important combating the overexertion and endless days of recuperation would be in finding my own recovery. Also how important my diet would be to recreate those atoms faster. Mitochondrial Dysfunction is my friend, but I am telling it to find a new playmate! I also began to understand why sitting up and standing created a falling sensation, what the autonomic nervous system was for and why it also was in a state of dysfunction.
I began searching on book websites for ME recovery stories and positive books about how to cope with the condition. Some were still very down beat and just wanted to tell me to live with it and get used to it. Others were saying "you can get better, here's how to best recreate that" Reading the reviews of these books have been my best ally in finding freedom. Dropping hints and website titles into the reviews has been and will continue to be the best way of finding recommendations for everything ME related as far as my recovery has gone. Research the ideas and "cures" before you decide to go ahead with them, but being free of this illness and finding freedom is totally possible. Don't believe in websites and books that wallow in self-pity, that say every cure is someone making money for old rope. Believing in recovery is the first step, some days are easier than other to trust that belief, but the knowledge, medical research and proof is there to show that recovery is possible. Read as much as you can, aid you own recovery, be your own doctor and create your own destiny.